Soul Care Archives - To Live As Christ

Let love in

December 28, 2017 by brianmichaelsteck Leave a Comment

Our kids wake up early. I rise at 5:30am, not to be “holier than thou”, but because, if I don’t, I get no chance at solitude in the day. So when a couple of ours woke at 6:30 this morning, we tried to convince them to sleep it out a little longer. My son was not having it.

In the middle of a temper tantrum in the darkness of a pitch-black room, I hung my head in desperation, pleading with him to lay back down and keep sleeping. Giving no relent in response to my exhaustion, I pulled my tearful child close to me and gave him a hug. The tears slowed. I was on to something.

“You want me to snuggle with you?” Immediately, he responded and headed towards his makeshift cot on the floor (because he insists on sleeping next to his sister, who he lovingly calls “gigger” because he can’t pronounce “sister”). He stopped his wailing, laid down on the giant overstuffed Costco teddy bear and sniffled on the floor next to me.

Love.

It all comes back to love, doesn’t it?

How many problems and stresses do we endure, when, if we would just let love in, we might solve or dispel in an instant?

When I’m anxious about work, fearful that a client will be frustrated or disappointed… love reminds me that I’m okay, even if I do fail.

When there is conflict in marriage… love reminds me that we’re on the same team.

When the brightness of day doesn’t overpower the darkness of hopelessness you feel inside… love says that you’re not alone, and that it’ll all be okay.

And when we scurry about from place to place, seeking meaning in gifts, or trophies or affirmation… let God’s love into the deep places that long to be held, stilled and quenched.

It will change your life, your pursuits, your interactions and expand your ability to freely love those around you. Let love in.

Book Review: Freedom of Simplicity by Richard Foster

January 1, 2017 by brianmichaelsteck Leave a Comment

To put it in a sentence: less is more.

Freedom of Simplicity by Richard Foster beckons all Christians to reconsider the excess which we allow to consume and define our lives. From over-busy schedules to feeding the ever-present demand for “more”, Foster pushes on the cavities of our heart and probes the reader’s deeper desires, asking from whence they came.

A student and teacher of spiritual disciplines, Richard Foster is also the author of “Celebration of the Disciplines” which changed my life when I read it at 18 years old. Though Celebration of the Disciplines outlines a dozen core spiritual practices, it doesn’t place guilty burdens on the reader or muck things up with philosophical jargon, and nor does Freedom of Simplicity.

The call to the church to reconsider their ways is both gentle and yet profound. Richard makes a strong case for believers to evaluate whether we are playing into the same system that we are fighting against, which is a system that seeks everything but the Kingdom of God first.

He points out that:

“While simplicity provides an answer to the modern dilemma, it does not provide an easy answer.”

The “dilemma”, Foster describes, is that our “Contemporary culture is plagued by the passion to possess… [and] furthermore, the pace of the modern world accentuates our feeling of being fractured and fragmented.” In other words, we’re being crushed by rush.

After laying the groundwork for his case via scripture and history, the book goes on to explore both inner, outer and corporate responses to the call — which I love, because often authors and speakers will draw conviction to an issue by spotlighting it, but fail to offer an appropriate response.

The journey of inner simplicity involves God-granted self-acceptance and choosing to abide in the “divine center”. This divines center offers inner peace and the cure from the seemingly insatiable demand for more. Our identity is no longer wrapped in acquiring stuff and success.

Out of this inner stillness, Foster looks at how obedience to the Holy Spirit simplifies our lives; holiness is not about striving and complicated laws, but simple and pure momentary obedience to God. If we continue to draw back to “the center”, most of life’s anxiety-laden decisions become effortless “yes Lord, okay Lord” experiences.

Through vulnerable examples and relatable stories from his own life, Richard Foster unveils practical steps towards simplicity, such as (in my words):

The power of saying “no”
Disengaging from over-involvement in church activities or social commitments
Community living and the impact of sharing possessions instead of owning
Avoiding the bombardment of media and its’ inherent lies of marketing

This book, which was written 3 years before my own birth and which I’m now reading 35 years after it was penned, describes a plugged-in and over-consumptive society of America in the 1980’s. How much more valuable and poignant are these words today, considering we’ve been on a non-stop barrel ride down the waterfalls of excess since then?

Foster’s encouragement towards individual lifestyles of self-imposed pseudo-poverty for the sake of spiritual abundance, intertwine with his philosophical over what this would look like at a societal level. Freedom of Simplicity goes on to consider the impact of our consumptive and self-focused decision making on our world.

He makes the case that we can no longer ignore the plight of millions who are suffering starvation, abuse and neglect around the globe. By allowing and benefiting from the products of multinational corporations, we’ve unwittingly affected the lives of people all over the world. Our greed is exacerbating their need.

We don’t get to choose whether or not we are a part of a global economy or not. Our lifestyle has already demanded this; the shoes we wear, the cars we drive, this computer I type on… in the name of affordability and luxury, we’ve allowed a burden to be placed on the third-world, and we have a responsibility to accept that guilt and respond.

In Freedom of Simplicity, Foster only provides a skimming view of the subject, but invites the church to take the lead in acknowledging our part and moving forward towards healing and balance.

Conclusion

In the end, this book hit me squarely between the eyes, convicting me in the midst of the Christmas season and in a time of my life when I was beginning to question my own “success” in the world’s eyes. I happened along the book in the right timing, because it has drawn my thoughts back to God’s perspective on my life and His desire to restore simple love and obedience in His children.

I highly recommend that you pick up a copy of Freedom of Simplicity — or better yet, that you rent it from the library or borrow mine — it just may be the key to unlocking inner simplicity and uncovering God’s design for joy in your life.

When it’s better to receive than to give

February 28, 2016 by brianmichaelsteck Leave a Comment

I believe that there is a time and position of the soul when it’s better to receive than to give.

Sincere pursuit of selflessness can turn into a kind altruism that is detrimental to our identity. In the effort of serving, loving and giving of ourselves, it’s so easy to get attached to the insatiable desire to please everyone and every thing. Our good intentions move us down a dangerous path of earning and striving, which is ultimately rooted in fear and not love.

Each time we bless others out of this good but tainted source, we deposit a little bit more of our worth and value in our actions.

What I’ve found to be true is that God’s love was never prompted from our actions. Instead, it is our very identity as His sons and daughters that induces this great love. It is relationship, not effort. And ultimately, it is identity — God’s identity, as the eternal source of love, reflected in us.

When Humility Is Really Pride

Ever been complimented and immediately denied the encouragement by listing a barrage of reasons why that could not possibly be true?

Ever give a compliment and get rejected like I would if I tried to dunk against an NBA player? Yeah. No fun. What’s up with that?

It’s false humility. And it can fool the best of us. Usually it’s because we don’t actually believe the compliment; either because of low self-esteem or being conditioned to reject compliments out of fear of being thought arrogant and thus unloveable.

This was me too. But I learned that the very response I thought was humility was actually pride. Giving off the aura of humility, my dejection of truth was actually a method of drawing more attention to myself. Don’t we all love it when, after rejecting encouragement, they come back with an extra heaping of it to help convince us?

I’ve found that true humility is grounded in God-centered identity and it allows us to accept compliments with a simple, “Thank you!”

Try it sometime. You’ll be amazed and what kinds of emotions and thoughts bubble up to the surface of your mind when you do; and once you get over the awkwardness of simply accepting encouragement, you can bring it before the Lord and let God heal you of the lies you believe about yourself.

Learning To Receive

I believe that the reason we’ve developed this “compliment-shield” is that, at our core, we don’t believe we are lovable. We believe we must earn love and that we couldn’t possibly be worthy of love simply because of who we are.

But this is what Jesus came to earth to prove to us:

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

God’s desire has always been for unity with His people. You were worthy of His love and sacrifice, even before you breathed your first breath.

Just try to say that: “I am worthy of love. God made me worthy of love.”

It’s not sin. It’s not arrogance. It’s not pride. It’s truth. And it brings God glory.

Let God love you.

When we acknowledge God’s love for us and our worthiness of God’s love, simply on the basis of being His, He is glorified. So stop fearing love. Step into it. When you do, you will experience the completeness that He intended for His children and you will understand that there is a time when it is better to receive than to give.

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